Shattered Dreams

I was quite discouraged after talking with neuro drs. They said that all recovery is in the first 2 years. That was about 6 mos ago.

My dreams were shattered. With that thought my mind knew that I'd always be in a wheelchair, that I'd never walk again and all my work and practicing for 6 mos was for nothing. I lost hope and faith. It all seemed like a joke to me.

I knew it was not good for me to let such thoughts take over. I forced myself to counteract my negativity with optimism. In my efforts I thought of how much I've progressed in the last 6 mos. I kept the thought that I could be the one to defy the odds (as my husband so graciously told me) and that the doctors didn't know me so they could be wrong about me. I figured that even if I didn't progress I could keep practicing and maybe the workouts would help me lose weight. It'd be great if I progressed but that wasn't the primary goal. It forced me to think of life how I am now and not just after I've recovered. For now I'll at least keep working out, maybe it will keep my mind off of my shattered dreams. I don't know if I will make a full recovery but I don't want the prayers on my behalf to be in vain.